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Dec. 20th, 2006 | 02:01 pm
music: Tokyo Police Club - Nature of the Experiment

When you drink coffe for example; drink to WAKE UP
When you smoke, smoke to get CANCER;
& when you drink, drink to get DRUNK
><

It's about time we embraced life before it slips past us
come on...lifes too short to be cool.
I try and surround myself with people who make me feel good about myself
I think i spend way too much time online, hahaha.
but the thing is i'm not a huge party girl;
I always have somewhere to be...
just my mind won't be there even if my body is. I'm too laid back for the club scene, too sober for the drug scene, too lazy for the sportys scene.
so fuck it. im creating my own subculture




Choose Life











" Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs."

If paradise is a state of mind, then mine is chemically enhanced

But i am proud to say I've been clean for almost two months...

Some percieve it as a weakness, an absence of mind.

It's in my vocabulary. If something happens in your life, something that changes the way you see yourself and all around you...it's always there in there in the background.

Just waiting to trip you up.

I'm hooked on a subcultural revolution.

A revolution of mind over matter

It's my belief that this is the generation of internal war.

...& we're loosing.





I'm an advocate of Drugs, Violence and temporary insanity.

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(no subject)

Dec. 17th, 2006 | 03:09 pm
mood: exanimate exanimate
music: Shit Disco- Reactor Party

My perception of beauty has been so distorted that i can no longer appreciate the aesthetics of life on the same level i used to.
Maybe this is a good thing, maybe not...but either way it's screwed up.
People i used to view as stunning are now just mediocre.
My personal view of myself has disingtregated to the point where i my self confidence is next to 0.
Narcassism is the crime of our society.

I remember watching a film when i was a little girl
[hollow man]
and there was a scene where this woman is raped by the protagonist,
the point of the matter is i remember thinking how beautiful i thought the actress was.
yet a sad thing happened.
the other day i turned on the television to see this film playing
and when this scene came up...i didn't feel the same way i used to.
i didn't feel as blown away by this woman as i once did.
The innocence of beauty has rotted away.


How fucked up is this?

Let's recap for a second.
To satisfy ourselves, because let's be honest we are all narcassistic screw jobs, we have to elevate to a new extreme

It's a new contest to stand out,
bright clothes...insane makeup...outlandish behaviour, attitude
Whatever.
too much is not even near enough.

so come on kiddies. If you'll rebel against anything then why not make it this.
At least you can validate it.

I'm the biggest fan of beauty, i'm infatuated by beautiful girls and boys. Im a freak like that.
I want to posess them, stick them in a museum for my twisted pleasure.


you can't fuck a perfect soul,
where's the glamour in imperfection.
there's no room for not good enough

TOO MUCH IS NOWHERE NEAR ENOUGH

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Caring is creepy.

Dec. 11th, 2006 | 08:09 am
location: Screaming into the infinite abyss
mood: so real ism so real ism
music: Mindless self indulgence - Kill the Rock

It's a funny thing how when you tell someone you love them, you realise just how little you do.

I don't believe in the politics of love.

Sure, i know the science of it.
It's an emotional state that forms a chemical reaction.
It releases endorphins,


[en·dor·phin (ěn-dôr'fĭn) Pronunciation Key
n. Any of a group of peptide hormones that bind to opiate receptors and are found mainly in the brain. Endorphins reduce the sensation of pain and affect emotions. ]


But what about ecstacy; or anyother mood stimulating drug...
Isn't that faster harder & easier?

What i don't like about this concept of love is the mass production of it.
Pumping it into the media.
films.
valentines day.
It's a money making industry.
Maybe because it's a legal high/ who knows.

It's just whored out.


Wasn't Cupid in reality just a fat kid with poor aim.
So love.
What is it.

Dictionary.com has over 20 definitions for it

love [luhv] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation noun, verb, loved, lov·ing.
–noun
1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.
5. (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?
6. a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.
7. sexual intercourse; copulation.
8. (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid.
9. affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one's neighbor.
10. strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books.
11. the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.
12. the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God.
13. Chiefly Tennis. a score of zero; nothing.
14. a word formerly used in communications to represent the letter L.
–verb (used with object)
15. to have love or affection for: All her pupils love her.
16. to have a profoundly tender, passionate affection for (another person).
17. to have a strong liking for; take great pleasure in: to love music.
18. to need or require; benefit greatly from: Plants love sunlight.
19. to embrace and kiss (someone), as a lover.
20. to have sexual intercourse with.
–verb (used without object)
21. to have love or affection for another person; be in love.
—Verb phrase
22. love up, to hug and cuddle: She loves him up every chance she gets.
—Idioms
23. for love,
a. out of affection or liking; for pleasure.
b. without compensation; gratuitously: He took care of the poor for love.
24. for the love of, in consideration of; for the sake of: For the love of mercy, stop that noise.
25. in love, infused with or feeling deep affection or passion: a youth always in love.
26. in love with, feeling deep affection or passion for (a person, idea, occupation, etc.); enamored of: in love with the girl next door; in love with one's work.
27. make love,
a. to embrace and kiss as lovers.
b. to engage in sexual activity.
28. no love lost, dislike; animosity: There was no love lost between the two brothers.

blah blah blah

It should come in pill form. if it's so good.
It's cheating lonliness. It's not even fucking real.

People get way too worked up about it.
consumes them
teenage nothings day dream about marriage and a perfect romance.

Has anyone even seen an actual heart?
i'd like to throw that in the face of our youth.
and hope they choke on the blood veins and fat.

It's just a cheap emotion.

You can't get it.

You can catch the liar. but it doesn't mean you can erase the lie.


=spoken like a true cynic =


NO. a realist.

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حَظٌّ سَيِّء

Dec. 7th, 2006 | 12:30 pm
location: In a chemically elevated state of mind
mood: austistic austistic
music: Radiohead - Karma Police

The transalation is Azar
I've been thinking about what the driving force is behind my passion for photography.
It is an instrument.
one that illustrates beauty and worships truth.
It glorifies our realities; to me...when i partake in photography, i'm creating my own form of surrealism.
I love my memories,
they are personal to me...bring a smile to my face, bring a frown. Draw a tear or make my ears ring with laughter.
Whatever the emotion is, it is derived from my own creativity
If time is the only constant,
how can we expected keep up with an eternity.
Our time here is marked, our memories may fail us.
I live to preserve a peice of that.



[ ikeepitonvibrate.deviantart.com ]

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